Melbourne ....Home to be?

I finally got my Australian residency status. Actually was last year haha....but only did my entry this year, 7th May 2010.

How do I feel? I felt going home for a celebration hahaha....really, the whole feeling is relaxing and easy.

This is the only trip where I did not took any photos. Really....not even one picture. Oh wait, there is one which I took in KLIA. Why this picture? Because in my entire life, this is the most expensive bottled water that i ever had!!! 8 ringgit for a such a small bottle of mineral water. Maybe small is not really descriptive, i should use the word "petite" to describe the size hahaha. The best part is i got thirsty again in the next 10 minutes.

Apart from the absurd price i paid for the water, i really enjoyed my short trip this time. I get to meet all my closest and bestest friends. Having the the time to share jokes, laughs, our problems and many other childhood memories. You guys really helped me to off-load some of my problems i have in mind.

So the next the question will be, is Melbourne going to be my home? I hope so....but it is not as easy as that. I need to have a steady job, a higher paid or better paid than what I have right now. Should I take the risk and make the leap? That is one thing that is bothering me......

Well, like the old chinese saying.....When a boat is about to dock, it will always sail in a straight line..... I am waiting for my breakthrough....

This is the 8 ringgit mineral water that i bought from coffee bean!!!!

Decision...

Decision, something that I would avoid. Did you realised that in life, it always involved this sort of choices. From the time you woke up to the time you went back to bed, it always involved decision. You need to decide on what to wear, what to eat, what to do for the rest of the day, where to go, whom to meet, and the list goes on. It is so exhausting sometimes.

Life as an infant is the best I think, where most of your decisions are taken care of. You do not need to decide on what to eat because there is only one standard meal for an infant. Even if you are kid, those meal choices are decided for by your parents. That would even includes the clothes to wear, and everything else.

But when you grew older, things you need to decide for yourself. Choices that you have to make the best for you. It is good sometimes to decide especially those that are obvious and of your choice. But what if those choices aren't what you want to have or you are not sure what you want anymore, what sort of decision would one need to choose or make ? How to make them?

I am a person who is lazy to decide especially on meals. I would just go to the same restaurant ordering different dishes on the menu. Or maybe I am exhauted from making choices and deciding has somehow put me in a dormant mood. To have someone to decide for you is then having a potential control freak that makes your life pretty much act as if like their remote control. I dont want that and I dont think I would be happy with that.

But then what is the one thing that I would be happy? That I would know that is the one? What is the one thing that really scares me at this point? Why is it so hard now for me to make one decision? Is it I am fighting with my internal self or am I running from something? I dont know and I dont know why am I feel so scared to make that decision that everyone is anticipating. The risk? The uncertainty that it possess? Something that I need to decide for myself, whether I will want to continue to stay put or take a leap and see if I can make it. Again, decision decision decision...... Sigh....I guess it is part of growing up.

How Do You Do?

Not sure how many people realised that is one question that was asked too many. It is almost the second question that sort of comes out naturally after you have said your selective hi or hello. It became a habit for everyone to say it, sometimes it doesnt carries the weight from its original meaning.

In the cyber world of chat, that is a convenient opening line for everyone, myself included. It is convenient and safe and you gives you enough time to think of another while waiting for an answer, so long if the other person you are talking to is of your interest. I used that line a lot and even more when I am in australia. Everywhere you go in Australia, hey there how are you doing.....of course you need to know that they are expecting a standard "im good, how about you?" answer from you. Whether they meant it or not, that is not the question.

Funny to think about it, in europe or malaysia we dont normally use that. There is sort of another way of determining the person is fine or not. By their looks, oh wait that just only me I think. Yeah come to think of it, when we not ask that sort of question. Whether we meant it or not, it is always felt good when someone asked how you do on that particular day. The problem with that question is when we have an elaborative respondent. It is a nightmare to hear how awful day it turned out to be for someone who you dont really care. I mean it is ok to hear from a friend but from a stranger, it just sometimes makes you feel awful or better if you managed to turn his negativity to the sun.

How Do You Do? I heard that a lot and that is one question that i dont have a real answer. I will always have a standard answer to give it to anyone who were to ask me. "I'm fine, thank you. " But am I really fine? am I feeling really good? am I really having a great day? Not all the time but I guess to save everyone's trouble, just give one simple answer that everyone would have expect and bring a smile on. The world doesnt need to know in details of how I feel.......it is one easy question with a hard answer.

So now, How Do You Do????.......